Blood for the Baron!

I noticed that the legend of Sexama-tron 4 was lost in the crash. That will not stand. So here is the rewritten version. Reloaded as it were.

Sexama-tron 4 - A life less not sexy.

The true life account of a top secret Government project to distil all the sexiness in the world into an incredibly handsome, tall, dark haired, stubble faced Cyborg who looks just like me.
Codename 'Sexama-tron 4'.

Act One

AREA 51: NEVADA

Sexama-tron 4 sits alone in his plush containment cell in Area 51 and plots an escape. The many Scientist bitches who wear sexy underwear under their white lab coats and sometimes take off their glasses and shake out their hair have begun to bore him. A new sexy challenge is needed.
The plan is simple and deadly-sexily effective. Sexama-tron 4 uses his sexy power to convince the hot Cleaning maid to excessively polish the floor so he can use the shiny reflection to look up her skirt. His Cyborg manhood swelling he seeks out the Facility Administrator. Once more using his sexy suggestion power he asks her to retrieve some non-existent files from the lowest filing cabinet and stares at her wiggling ass as she searches until nightfall. Now mightily aroused he steals into the barracks under cover of darkness, wakes up all 200 guard chicks (who wear sexy underwear under their combat fatigues) and uses his mega boner to sex them all back into an exhausted sleep. With the last guard chick finally murmuring contentedly into her pillow Sexama-tron 4 opens the front door, which isn't locked, and begins his long trek across the Nevada desert.

Act Two

LAS VEGAS CASINO

After a long journey during which he doesn't disturb the desert goats indigenous to the area sexually at all, Sexama-tron 4 reaches Las Vegas where he does some gambling and wins BIG by using his sexy power to influence the roulette table. He then celebrates his sexy luck by going to a few shows where they in fact ONLY wear sexy underwear and no clothes AT ALL.
After a backstage party with 20-30 show girls he feels a bit sleepy and has a nap up in his hotel room (which he sexed for free).

Just after 2AM Sexama-tron 4 is woken by a bright light and is greeted by a sexy Alien (not weird Alien like the Alien from Alien, but sexy Alien, like the Vulcan chick from Enterprise or Natasha Henstridge in Species) Battle Commander played by Ivanova from Babylon 5 who forces him at laser point to go back to her ship to undergo a sexiness test. Her scans have shown that he is the sexiest being on the planet and If he should pass she will take him back to her home planet of Scizzor which is populated solely by sexy Alien females who need sexing before they become extinct.
A simple task for the embodiment of all sexiness in the world you might think but Sexama-tron 4 is about to meet his kryptonite. The Alien Battle Commander is not wearing any sexy underwear under her Battle uniform. She's just plain naked. No suspenders, stockings or anything.
Sexama-tron 4 can't get a bone on, fails the test and is dumped, naked, out of the ship, his giant flaccid cyborg penis helicopter-re-re-ring wildly in the wind.

Act Three

MOJAVE DESERT

Stranded & disheartened, Sexama-tron 4 turns his back on sexiness and forms a close but NOT sexually intimate relationship with the goats of the desert. Delighting in simple not sexy pleasures such as making cheese (but not eating it though, goats cheese is rank) and star counting. Sexama-tron 4 is content. But his happiness is not to last.
One crisp, cold desert night, when Sexama-tron 4 is snoring contentedly after a busy evening accidentally milking a handsome Billy goat, a jeep arrives.
It's the Colonel dude from Rambo. He has a job that only Sexama-tron 4 can complete. The Colonel reveals in rambling fashion with flashbacks and finger quotes that Sexama-tron 4 was not the only successful Sexy Cyborg or 'Sexborg' to be created in the top secret Government project. Originally there were four.
Sexama-trons 2 and 3 exploded due to excessive unstable sexy levels but Sexama-tron 1 remains under heavy guard and fitted with a special sexy inhibitor to prevent him from 'sexploding' like his counterparts.
At least he was under heavy guard. Sexama-tron 1 has slipped his inhibitor and escaped. If he isn't captured and fitted with a new inhibitor within 24 hours he will 'sexplode' wasting billions of dollars of Government research money and causing untold damage probably. Sexama-tron 4 will have to unload all his sexy powers and sexy cunning on Sexama-tron 1 to succeed in his mission.

SEXAMA-TRON 4: So I'll be sexing an exact copy of me?!
COLONEL DUDE: Well yes, I suppose. But the important thing you ha...
SEXAMA-TRON 4: I'll do it.
BILLY GOAT: Maaaa-aaah

Colonel dude, Sexma-tron 4 and handsome Billy goat drive off into the sunset on the quest for: THE FIRST SEXAMA-TRON.

*FADE TO BLACK*

Saved for bedtime reading, I'm quite excited already!

That was the whole point of the crash.

The Baron wrote:That was the whole point of the crash.

Oooooooooooooooooooooooooo Get her!!!

Can we have him banned for posting porn? lol

Red Laser wrote:Can we have him banned for posting porn? lol

It's arty porn, Laser. Soft focus lens and cut to sunset. Classy an that.

Jimbobx wrote:

Red Laser wrote:Can we have him banned for posting porn? lol

It's arty porn, Laser. Soft focus lens and cut to sunset. Classy an that.

Isn't that just because you have smeared the lens with Vaseline?

ODB wrote:

Jimbobx wrote:

Red Laser wrote:Can we have him banned for posting porn? lol

It's arty porn, Laser. Soft focus lens and cut to sunset. Classy an that.

Isn't that just because you have smeared my rim with Vaseline?

You know all the tricks, Rich.